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if you stick around, i'll sing you pretty sounds.

smudge clothing company.
sometimes randy and sporadicfunk and i draw pictures and we put the pictures on shirts and you have to buy them.

here is a direct link to our store on zazzle.

shirts for sale.

also, you can find us on facebook.

become a fan.
guide to success with my weblog.
step one: read everything to the right of this module.
step two: click every number at the bottom of the screen.
step three: go back to step one.

repeat infinity times.
this is my personal assistant.
i managed to break this little nutang helper from his contract with nutang, and now he works for me. his name is jump-for-joya. he manages this site. all complaints and other inquiries should be directed to him.


he thanks you for your cooperation.
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Doing the damn thing
Thursday. 7.28.22 4:27 pm
Life is coming along.

I’m very happily married, I have two awesome kids, and I get to work from home.

I need to exercise more and get my heart into good shape. My stepfather died a few weeks back out of nowhere, just dropped while out riding his bike. I can’t have that happen to me. I need to take better care of myself.

I started taking daily vitamins, and I am on daily meds for my blood pressure and so I can get decent sleep at night. I don’t get migraines much anymore.

I hope life has been good to all of you. I’m sorry there have been years of absence from me. I’m sorry I’m not around. Life gets in the way, ya know?

But I’m still here. You’re still here. We are doing the damn thing, folks. Keep it up.


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Wednesday. 10.2.19 8:36 am
I got this from a “friend” a few months back via FB messenger.

“Hey Scott! How are you? Congratulations on the pregnancy, so exciting. I can totally relate to your previous situation with the first baby as I had lost 2 before having my first. God works in wonderful ways and trusting him is always best no matter the situation.
I wanted to reach out, I'm not sure if you have seen my health journey but I've been wanting to share with so many others. I work for Arbonne and they have an amazing nutritional program that guides you to a healthier lifestyle. I would love to share more with you as we have a group starting Aug 5th if you're interested. I hope your summer is going well and look forward to hearing from you 🙂“

...can we not with the multi level marketing bullshit? Can there at least be a line between my child who passed away and trying to sell me nutritional shakes?

I didn’t respond. I haven’t talked to this person since about 2005. I hope she figures out she’s a terrible person on her own.


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Sunday. 8.19.18 10:39 pm
My cat, Doc, died on Friday. He was ten. My wife and I were laying in the couch watching anime, and we heard a howl, unlike any Ive heard before. We jumped up asking what was wrong, and he could not move. He howled again and again, then stopped. We yelled for him. I picked him up and cradled him, and saw the terrified look in his eyes. I felt his whole body quivering as I rocked back and forth telling my wife that I didnt understand what was happening. His shaking stopped and his eyes glazed over. Hes gone, I yelled, still rocking, while my wife frantically tried calling emergency vets to figure out what to do. I tried to breathe air into him, but it didnt work. Hes gone, I cried. Our other cat, Gus, sniffed Doc, but was also terrified, and he backed away into the other room.

We gently placed Doc into a carrier and drove to the emergency vet, crying our eyes out all the way. The vet confirmed that his heart had stopped, and stated that cats of this age sometimes have undetected heart disease and he could have had a blood clot.

Hes gone.

Doc was the first pet I had that was mine. I picked him up when he was a kitten from a place I found via a penny saver ad. There were a few kittens there. He was standing next to his bowl full of food, and out of nowhere he slapped the bowl and sent the food flying everywhere. Thats the one. I said.

He was a crazy cat. He loved running around outside when I lived with my dad. He took a while to warm up to Gus but became a great big brother to him in time. He loved running around our house.

Minutes before he passed, he was sprinting all around the house as if out of nowhere, and it reminded me of when he was a kitten. So crazy.

I love him and miss him terribly. I wasnt ready for him to go, but this shitty universe is beyond my understanding.

This year I lost my grandfather, my unborn child, and now Doc. I hate this year. I really fucking do.

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Friday. 7.20.18 7:08 pm
Life has been stressful.

Over the last year, my wife and I decided we wanted to have a family.

Im ready to be a dad. Ive been ready.

Life doesnt always work out though. Ive learned that the hard, literal way.

Now Im just tired all the time. And in pain. I dont even know the right way to express how Im feeling and what Im thinking.

No one said life was fair. Im not sure why I thought it would be.

My life isnt over by any means, Im just fucking stressed out. On weekends when I used to wake up at 6 or 7 I find myself sleeping until 10 or 11. That cant be good. And even when I wake up earlier I cant bring myself to get out of bed. Im working on that.

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i sneezed
Thursday. 1.11.18 8:47 pm
Things are good.

The other day, I sneezed and threw out a muscle near my right rib cage that I didnt know existed. I guess this is growing up.

Ive been training someone for my company the last two weeks, and today is my first day back in the field, investigating away. I was afraid Id forget how to do it because Ive been doing nothing but looking over my trainees shoulder since the day after Christmas.

I found a cool ramen place called Ejji. I ate there once a week the last three weeks, and am hoping to go back this weekend with the wife. Spread the noms.

How were your holidays?


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how to.
Friday. 11.10.17 2:00 pm
i'm learning how to program unity 3d. my laptop can barely handle it because it's "old." old is in quotations because computer "old" and old have separate meanings. i feel like if i make anything too complex my laptop will explode or just shut down, emotionally.

i need some new music. i am not happy with what apple music recommends for me each friday, besides maybe one or two songs, normally those of which are by artists i already listen to. and why does the indie hits playlist always fill itself with 1000 songs that all sound exactly the same?

if anyone has any good music recommendations or wants to buy me a new laptop, drop a comment. the rest of you mean nothing to me. just kidding! or am i?

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when you buy my things it makes me happy.
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